chapter 2: honestly wtf

*Chirp Chirp*

Jim woke up in an instant to the sound of his comm. Being captain and all, you always have to be alert, even at, what does the clock say? ugh 0300 hours. Jim reached over to the bed side table where his comm sat and flipped it open with one hand, using the other to brush over his face.

“kirk here.” he said with slight irritation 

“spock here. captain, i need you to come to my quarters immediately.”

“spock? are you alright, are you hurt?” the captain says in the midst of worry and confusion.

“an explanation would be illogical. just hurry, jim. spock out.”

jim just sat there with his mouth open. what the hell? it wasn’t like spock to just not go into explanation. something must be up. So he quickly put on some pants and was out the door in record time.

he was hesitant when he reached spock’s quarters. what could possibly be so crazy that it left spock so wick wack??? he entered in the captains override code and quickly jumped into the room when the doors slid open, ready to face any attackers. 

*smack*

he was hit. he was a goner. somebody tell his crew he loved them because he was down. 

laying on the groung, jim opened his eyes. what the heckie deckie was that? he looked up at spock, who was nakey from the waist down. he was holding a plastic gun-like contraption they used to make centuries ago. but something was missing

jim looked spock in the eye and whispered “where’s the dingle dangle?”

spock just shakes his head and points to the floor.

he shot his own peen out of a gun. spock shot his own peen out a gun

“come here, jim” spock said as gently as a vulcan who just shot his cucumber at his captain. 

jim got up on the bed and just lied there among his confusion. he’s starting to learn a lot about his first officer. the chocolate nipples, and now this? what will be next?

once jim made it back to his quarters, he decided he needed to let it all out to his log

“uh- captain’s log. star date: do people even know what year it is or do they just say random numbers?” he lets out a sigh. but really though, who really knows how to keep up with the star date? what do the decimals stand for? questions he would’ve asked his dad if he wasn’t dead. or maybe even pike, but he’s dead too.

“log, do you ever feel, like a plastic bag? floating through the wind, wanting to start again?”

*~fin~*